Keith’s Amusing Musings

As mentioned previously, I am taking the Digital Photography workshop at Photographic Center Northwest (PCNW) in Seattle with the goal of improving the quality of my photographs, specifically, and getting more enjoyment from the creative aspects of photography, in general.

The workshop consists of five 3-hour courses that are held from 6-9PM on Thursdays at PCNW. The six other students and I had our first session on Oct 27. First impression: Not good.

Here are a few lowlights that led me to re-read the fine print regarding workshop reimbursements:

He started the class by informing us of his qualifications including 12 years as a professional photographer, 5 years teaching and an avid digital photographer since the inception of digital photography. I lost all respect when he made the following statements (and stuck to them after being further probed/challenged by me):

• He does not own a digital camera.
• A camera’s resolution determines the quality of the pictures it produces regardless of the size of its image sensor or the dimensions of the pixels on the sensor. For example, a current 8 mega-pixel consumer point-and-shoot camera will produce higher quality pictures than a current 6 mega-pixel professional digital single lens reflex camera. (FACT)
• Merely opening a JPG/JPEG file for viewing and closing it (no editing, no re-saving) degrades the image quality over time because JPG/JPEG is a lossy format. (FACT)

My jaw literally dropped when I heard the last two at different points in the presentation. I balked at both. The instructor tried unsuccessfully to parry my contempt-laden ridicule of the sheer lunacy of his words. For the 3rd bullet I even asked if this were true for images hosted on the web that get viewed thousands if not millions of times. He said, “Yes, the images lose a small amount of quality each time they are viewed.” Other people in the class chimed in on that one as well asking about images burned to CD-R or marked read-only. He held firm. I grew silent and somber upon recalling the adage “Never argue with a fool since people might not know the difference.” All I could do is shake my head and state, “I have never heard that before.”

He has exactly two more sessions to tighten up his game and make me a believer before I pull a Fitzgerald and draft an indictment of his competence. Right now, my vote is:

Keith

Taking a page from the Buschick and DBH playbooks, I opted to utilize the Seattle public transportation system to cart me between work, my weekly digital photography workshop and back home each Thursday for the next 5 weeks. I must concur with the sentiments of my Metro aficionados by stating, unequivocally, the bus system in Seattle is excellent considering a tyro like me did fairly well after avoiding the bus like the plague since the intern years (circa 1997).

I visited the Metro Online Trip Planner weeks ago to plan my route. The simple-to-navigate site helped me quickly determine a practically door-to-door route to get from 148^th Ave NE & NE 40^th St in Bellevue to 12^th Ave & E Marion St in Seattle in 70 minutes using 3 buses (242 to 545 to 12).

The first of the five classes for the digital photography workshop I am enrolled in was today so it was time to put my bus plan into action. A few times I considered backing out and just driving myself but I figured it was now or never and a bus adventure would surely provide better blog fodder than being stuck in traffic by my lonesome.

JS, one of my few remaining friends sans blog, dropped me off at the transit center since we had just finished Kickin’ It^tm. After noticing I had apparently missed the 242 (great start to the trip!) JS pointed out the 545 Express departed directly from the same transit center as well. Sure enough the 545 arrived around 4:28PM and I was on my way. Muchos propos (or is that Los propos grande?) to JS for saving me an unnecessary transfer. The 545 whisked me across the SR-520 bridge and I was in downtown Seattle in under 30 minutes.

Buschick told me beforehand the 545 to 12 transfer was unnecessary if I did not mind hoofing it about a mile from 5^th & Madison to Photographic Center Northwest (PCNW) located at 12^th & Marion. Since I arrived downtown much quicker than originally anticipated, I had time to kill and decided to see just how bad the walk would be. Aside from 99.44% of the one mile walk being uphill it was not too bad since it was a nice (read: not raining) day and the fresh air did me some good. It took me from the time I departed the 545 at 5:03 exactly 20 minutes to arrive at PCNW. This included some unnecessary meandering on my part since I insisted on staying on Marion as much as possible despite it inconveniently terminating into I-5 and Broadway. (I will be sure to take Madison to 12^th in the future.)

The return trip was a bit more <ahem> interesting:

1. The class ended 10 minutes early so I figured I would try to catch the 550 at 9:15 rather than 9:45.
2. It was now raining.
3. I was not dressed for chasing buses (slacks, buttoned-down shirt, hard bottom dress shoes, 15lb backpack full of photography equipment).

Despite the reduced odds of making it 1.5 miles (12th & Marion to 2nd & Spring in 25 minutes) created by #2 and #3 I made up my mind to catch that bus mainly because I did not feel like hanging around downtown Seattle for an additional 30 minutes. I called my wife to confirm my route and for a pep talk as I walked briskly. When I made it to 11th & Madison I saw the #12 bus and quickly/correctly realized it could get me to 2nd & Madison much quicker than going à pied. The problem: The bus and I were on opposite sides of the street and the bus was a block ahead. This turned out to be a big problem. I decided to go olskool and chase the bus. I darted through traffic to cross the street and started closing the distance so quickly I actually thought I had a chance. The light turned green and the bus left me about 15 yards back. I briefly slowed to a slight jog peering ahead for the next bus stop and the state of the next stoplight. The bus came to a halt and the light was red so I again broke into a frantic sprint. This time I only got within 30 yards. I kept running undaunted because I was sweating, mad and going to catch that damned bus despite #2 and #3 above.

Somewhere along the line I noticed I was now running downhill at a breakneck pace on a steep decline on slick pavement in hard bottom shoes. More importantly, the 12 was no longer in sight. Glancing at my watch I realized I now had to keep running or risk missing the 550 as well. Great!

I am sure I was a sight to behold in the eyes of the few pedestrians in the vicinity. One guy had headphones on walking away from me and at the last minute must have heard my thunderous footfalls and heavy breathing as I ran upon him since he jumped and spun around as if preparing to defend himself (on guard!). I neither had the time nor energy to laugh so I just kept truckin’. I made it to 2nd & Madison at 9:05, made a left onto 2nd and kept running south hell-bent on making it to Spring to catch that 9:15 bus.

Anyone familiar with the Seattle downtown area will probably immediately notice the error in the previous sentence. For those of you not familiar, let me just say I made it to 2nd & James before realizing something seemed very wrong. At this point saying I was winded would be an understatement just as saying I was pissed would be. I figured, “I should have hit Spring by now” and the dang bus was due to arrive at 2nd & Spring in five minutes. So, what do I do when I don’t have a clue? I used a lifeline and called the boss (you can call her my wife). She flatly told me Spring is north of Madison. Yes, that is right damas y caballeros, I had just run sprinted four city blocks in the wrong friggin’ direction! Even better news, I now had less than three minutes to run back the other way…uphill. :furious:

How did that last screw-up happen? I blame the Seattle city planners. As you can see from the highlight circles in the image below, Spring is south of Madison when walking north on 12th from Marion (which is the route I took upon leaving PCNW). After crossing Broadway, Madison is south of Spring. My mental snapshot of the relative order of the streets I had passed along my journey had worked against me.

The good news is I made it in time to catch the 9:15 bus. The aggravating news is the bus also stopped at 2nd & Cherry but I must have been too preoccupied emulating Lance Armstrong in the Pyrenees without the bike to notice.

While I now fully endorse the idea of bussing it in Seattle, navigating around downtown should be left to the pros.

Keith

My wife and I attended the Ship/Costume Party opting to rage against the machine as a doctor (her) and nurse (me). We received many compliments on our costumes. Mine was an authentic nurse’s get-up purchased from Acorn Uniforms on a referral from a friend who is an actual nurse. I had a real stethoscope and “RN” lapel pin. Hers was the typical lab coat, stethoscope, mask and patient chart.

Good times were had by all. :party:

Keith

In a previous post I ranted about some of the Apple iPod’s shortcomings including the horrible support options offered by Apple for defective iPod’s no longer under warranty. To fix the poor battery performance and defective hard drive issues I was experiencing with my 30GB, 3rd-generation iPod I sent it to iPodResQ.

I am pleased to report iPodResQ did not disappoint. Not only did they replace the defective drive, they also upgraded my player to 40GB in the process. Also, due to an oversight on their side, I received the battery replacement for free. When I contacted customer support to inquire about the missing item on my invoice their response: “Enjoy a freebie on us!” That is my kind of service.

If you have a broken iPod that you are currently using as a paperweight, consider contacting iPodResQ to see if they can help. For $29 up front they will overnight a pre-paid shipping container to you that will be returned to them via overnight delivery for a full diagnosis of the problem. They will then contact you in the next day or so to explain what is wrong and how much it would cost to fix. You then have the option of proceeding with the repair or having the defective unit returned to you.

Keith

This post requires reader participation. First choose a subtitle for this post from the list below:

• “How Far We Have Come, How Far We Have Left To Go”
• “What It Can Teach You About Your Colleagues”
• “What the F–k?!”

Background

The division I work in is on the verge of shipping — “releasing” for those outside the software industry — the latest version of a pretty big product which has been under development for almost 3 years. To celebrate this momentous event, all employees who have contributed to the product are being rewarded by the company with a “Ship Party.” The twist is this particular party has been advertised as a costume party. Costumes are not required but they are strongly encouraged in the name of good, wholesome fun at the end of a challenging product development cycle.

I have debated back-and-forth on whether I would participate in the costume portion of the party since everyone on my immediate team intends to participate and have been pressuring me to do so as well to “lead by example.” My wife is like me when it comes to things of this sort which means she is not too keen on playing dress-up and just wants to go and have a good time. If she were to agree to don a costume it would be up to me to choose something she would approve and to handle the logistics.

Since my colleagues have been pressuring me I decided to enlist their help in selecting costumes for my wife and me. This is where things took a turn to the, shall we say, interesting (or perhaps enlightening). What follows are two excerpts from actual conversations I have had with separate colleagues at separate times.

Disclaimer: I am a Black man proudly working in corporate America. The people on the other end of these exchanges are on the opposite end of the melanin spectrum. I mention this not because I believe there is any correlation between that physical human characteristic and the opinions/ignorance unintentionally expressed through one’s words; but because I believe there are some things that get lost or overlooked when we attempt to identify with each other that turn out to be comical when put into their proper context.

Excerpt 1

Colleague 1: “Are you going to the party?”
Me: “Yeah, are you going?”
C1: “Yep! Are you wearing a costume?”
Me: “I haven’t decided. I can’t think of anything to wear.”
C1: “Why don’t you go as a pimp?!”
Me: :sniff:
C1: “Or what about a gangsta?” (Editor’s note: notice the -sta.)
Me: “Umm, I was thinking of something a little less, uh, controversial. Like a professor or lawyer.
C1: (Agitated) “Na, that’s boring.” (Pause) “You should go as a rapper.”
Me: “Uhh…”
C1: “Plus you have a bald head. It would be perfect.”
Me: :rolleyes:

Excerpt 2

Me: “Are you and your wife going to the ship party?”
Colleague 2: “Yes, we’re going as ____ and ____. Are you and your wife going?” (Editor’s note: redacted to protect the innocent.)
Me: “Yeah, we’ll be there.”
C2: “Are you dressing up?”
Me: “We haven’t decided yet. We can’t decide on costumes.”
C2: “You two should go as Ike and Tina Turner!”
Me: :sniff:

Now, dear reader, help me with my dilemma. Should I:

A: Rage against the machine Heathcliff Huxtable style and prove that a bald-headed, Black man can be a professor, lawyer, etc. without being immediately hackneyed or summarily dismissed with some veiled euphemism for “unauthentic”?

B: Go with the flow and further the stereotypical belief that being a Black man in America is synonymous with being a great pimp, gangster, rapper or legendary wife beater (especially when you throw in the catalytic bald head)?

I am scared if I consult another colleague he/she might suggest my wife and I go as Dred and Harriet Scott which would surely land me on the 6 o’clock news.

“Give us free!” — Cinque, Amistad

Keith